It has occurred to me that, over the years, I have accumulated some knowledge. Some of it has even proven useful. For the most part, knowledge comes in two forms. First, it is simple learning. Lets say that you learn a new skill - perhaps how to change the tire on your car. Knowledge. Congratulations. The second kind of knowledge is a bit deeper and I refer to it as relational knowledge.
Relational Knowledge. Contextual. Application of it. Understanding what it is you know and how it relates to your life and perhaps other aspects of it. This is the kind of knowledge that perhaps philosophers understand. In the example of the car tire the relational aspect of knowing how to change YOUR car tire means that you are most likely to be able to change MOST car or even truck tires.
I my life I have learned a few things and, while I very rarely am able to point back to a single event in which a life lesson was presented, I tend to apply the cumulative knowledge to my life and often if is formed as advice.
I'll get on with my example here.
A friend of mine came to me a few years ago in a pretty difficult life situation. A situation that sadly at least half of us all have to endure. He knew I had been through similar so he came to me to talk and obtain my perspective. Our discussion grew into a generalization of life challenges in general, so my metaphor if more inclusive than just the event that initiated the discussion.
Lets say for a moment that you are in crisis. Not the kind where you are out of nachos before Game of Thrones is coming on, but the kind that is life changing or altering. You see, as humans we are constantly figuring out our path and planning our route to avoid dangers and pitfalls. Its how we are wired - to avoid injury and pain. So a change was made and the path you had previously planned is now gone. You have a new path and perhaps you have to travel it alone.
Imagine yourself at the base of a mountain and it has a long but relatively clear path that winds along the outer edge. Attached to you is your sled. On this sled is all your life and lets face it, we all have a lot of stuff. My sled if different than yours, and it is unique. We can unload a few things but generally its all coming with us.
You look up this mountain with a Tony Robbins attitude and reciting "I think I can, I think I can, I think I can.." and you start to pull slightly but the sled barely moves. The weight is tremendous. You look up the slope and now it is further away its is becoming overwhelming and all you can think is "How can I possibly get to the top?"
You see, we have been trained from a young age to target the wrong things. Phrases like "Keep your eye on the prize" are drilled into us. We are told to set goals and never lose sight of them. Perhaps this is not right. Perhaps, just perhaps we are not wired to perform in such a way. Some are. Some people certainly are and when we hear their stories on TV or on a Ted Talk video we are inspired - and so we should be. But that was them. They have a different sled.
So how do I suggest to climb that hill? I tackle it a little bit different.
I say to not look up the mountain for too long. Don't let the big picture swallow up up. Lean into the straps and pull. Pull your sled. First one step. Then two. Then three. You get the picture.
While Newton's laws are designed to explain the physical world, I think there are emotional and intellectual mechanisms that can also be described similarly. Inertia is a funny thing because an object in rest tends to stay at rest. Upon the first pull you made on your sled you thought "Crap. That's heavy". Then you looked up the slope (at your goal, mind you) and you instantly executed some simple but rough mathematics to arrive and a huge number. This is not a number of reality because it was based on the first pull and the energy it took to try and move the sled from a full stop is LESS then the energy needed to keep it moving. Getting it to move is hard. Keeping it moving is easier because the inertia also will work for you because an object in motion will tend to want to stay in motion.
So instead of looking up that hill again. Just lean into the straps and feel the weight. Feel the strain and feel how hard it is, but notice that it gets a little easier with each step. Focus on that. Do not ever look up. Well, not yet.
At some point you will tire and will need rest. This is a part of the cycle. So let your sled come to a stop on its own. Do not look up. Look back. Look back to see your footprints and sled marks and appreciate what you just accomplished. Now you can rest, but don't look back up the hill. Not yet.
When rested, look back first. Look at how far you came. Now look up. Crap. Its still a long distance, but instead of multiplying distance by energy, simply subtract what you just did from some unknown value. You won't know how much is left, but it is less then it was yesterday by the amount you appreciated.
Now, lean back into the straps and pull again - follow the same process as the first day and never look up the hill. When you tire, rest and look back. Wow. Now you have gone twice as far, if not more. Each cycle will bring you more strength and you will actually accomplish more with each successive cycle. When you look up you will should know that you are twice as close as you were before.
If you follow this process of not being overwhelmed but the mountain, there will come a point. A very important one. A point in which you will realize that the distance travelled is about half way to the end. While your assessment is merely a judgment or best guess, its a pretty important realization. Now when you look up, its less than the distance you have already travelled and you no longer have the same sense of dread.
Why is that important? Well, it is at this point when the overwhelming feeling will start to decay. At this point at which you no longer fear, to the same degree, the mountain. You may be tired but even if you take a longer rest now, its OK.
The important moment exists because it is the transition to a realization that whatever hill we climb, we only have to fight the first half. That's the part that really has the control and power over our sense of capability. The rest of the journey can be completed with a lighter heart because you are stronger and you have proven that you can make it half way, to the rest of the way is a mere duplication of your previous accomplishment. For the most part you did this by not looking up.
Regardless of your crisis. Just lean into the straps an pull. Feel the load and be mindful of the decrease in energy required. Don't get fooled by the initial weight because inertia will resist your pull and later it will be your ally.
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